Sadly, the world did not end yesterday and we are all alive and well.
This is why.

http://www.theonion.com/static/videos/widgets/player/blank.mp4

We were sitting at the kitchen table, eating.
Silverware clinked.
Teeth chomped.
Dad opened his mouth, some food falling out. 
"I have a very special announcement! We-"
Then the roof fell in.
Mom screamed, and that cat pounced on my head, claws digging into my scalp.
We could hear explosions.
"NO! THE STOVE!" Mom panicked.
Our house burst into flames.
I guess we'll never hear the special announcement.